Love sucks. I would almost venture to say that Love is the most powerful thing on earth. Love makes you crazy, blind, and sometimes stupid. Whether it is a love for a partner, kids, friends, nieces and nephews, siblings, or parents. Love suck.
When you love someone, you want what makes them happy and taken care of. Sometimes with kids or nieces and nephew, love means saying no. With parents, friends, and even partners sometimes love means being honest even if it means maybe hurting that person or risking that relationship....with my parents, I'm not so good at this. With partners or potential partners, love sometimes means that you have to say no to yourself. Do or say what they need from you in that moment instead of thinking of yourself.
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I have always loved 1 Corinthians 13 from the bible, although I don't think I have been very good at living it.
1 Corinthians 13: 4-8
"4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails."
Love in real life is hard, and when you find it....it's awesome...but it sucks if you are waiting for it or can't seem to get it right.
Love being patient and Kind...I got that. Doesn't envy, boast, or dishonor...those are sometimes harder. Never proud, always trusts, always hopes...sometimes feel impossible.
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I have heard that this chapter could be applied to God because "God is love. And that seems to work. Of course God is all patient and hopeful and kind and all that....he knows how it ends. So if whoever he loves isn't talking to him now or things are going shitty for them or something....no worries...God knows it will end well because he's been there.
But what about people? People like me and others who aren't God? We don't know how it will end. I trusted and hoped for many more years with my father figure, hoped and trusted that he would see me get married, have kids and maybe be like a second grandpa to them.....but in the end....he didn't even get to see me graduate College because he died 6 months too soon....Six months.
I have spent way too many nights wondering if I would still have a best friend in the morning, or if I would ever get to talk to her again because she had been gone for days and the last thing I heard.....well wasn't good.
I have spent most of my life wondering out one could claim to love yet abuse and (at least seemingly) hate the very person they claimed to love. "She" said she loved me, but the reports say she abused me and rumor has it she said for years that I was dead.....I guess in her eyes I might have been.
I have cried over people who say that they love me, but act as if they hate me or a part of me.
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People say they love you, but then the abuse you (physically, emotionally, mentally/psychology), they manipulate you,, they judge and cast their verdict on you....that can't be love.
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Everyone says that God is love. But where is he went the abuser attacks, or the young girl is taken only to be used....or when that same girl must endure horrors so that she may be used some more?
I know I can't really pin this one on God....but...where is the love when a person who claims to be following God and living out his love treats someone else like crap because they don't fit into their precious little box of how the world and people should be?
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Love I know exist, I feel it....and everyone says it's this great thing.....but is it really? Is love really good....or is love just this complex mess of emotion that no one can control or really deal with making it potentially dangerous and volatile? Can we expect good things if someone says that they love us? Or should we really be running for cover when that say that because you never know if what will happen next will be good or bad?
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Should we run and hide from love? Would things actually be better that way?
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