This song has kinda been like my song lately. Especially these lines: "So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage I'm standing up, I'ma face my demons I'm manning up, I'ma hold my ground I've had enough, now I'm so fed up Time to put my life back together right now!"
The last several months I have felt obligated to do so much; to graduate, to be a good leader at church, to grieve, to be strong for Renee...in short to be faithful to everyone and everything else. I thought to say I can't do that or to try to just focus on me would be selfish and being unfaithful. But tonight, over coffee my friend Lauren echoed what I think my heart as been trying to tell me. I am not faithful, because I go to church every week or because I do all the right things...I'm faithful becuase it's in me...I am consisent, thorough in what I do, and trusted in my commitments. But the other thing my friend pointed out, is that I can't give anything to anyone without first investing in myself so that I have something to give away.
I just messaged my friend my planned resignation from my leadership at church. I need to show myself that I am valuable enough to deserve being a priority, to deserve some of my faithfulness being directed toward myself.

I don't have to be perfect, but I have to be true to me.

So here goes